Lessons I Learned After Graduation

I can’t just fucking believe that it’s been over a year since your awesomeness graduated from college. Is it really been a year? Grabe, parang kahapon lang. I can still remember how happy and ecstatic I was that day. I cannot explain that amazing feeling I felt. It was surreal as it can get. And seeing my mom displaying her “i-am-so-proud-of-my-son” smile, it was just priceless. 

When I was on stage, I kept my feet from dancing. Of course, I don`t want to ruin the solemnity of the occasion. Plus, ayaw ko ding mabansagang “The Dancing Graduate”. Hahaha. Parang traffic enforcer lang. 

But months after that, I became a mess. A TOTAL MESS. I came in and out of post-college depression. The last quarter of 2011 was just depressing. I don’t know the direction where I’m headed to. I’ve felt so unfocused with what I wanted to do in life. Probably, unemployment and being broken-hearted does that to some people. Haha. But it was on the 4 months of self-struggle and depression, I learned valuable lessons in life. Let me share some ~

Lesson # 1: A dream is a hope that never sleeps. You know how they always say “pursue your dreams”. That’s easier said than done. But really, you just gotta do it. If you failed, try again. Nothing in the world is easy. Work hard and never quit.

Lesson # 2: Shit happens. Just when you think you’re having this perfect life then something will come along to prove you’re wrong. Life is not always peaches and cream baby. And that’s the sad reality. Hindi pwedeng lagi kang nasa taas. Sometimes you need to experience hiccups to stay real, to be humble. No matter how much you plan and prepare, nothing in life is guaranteed. Things can change in a heartbeat and you need to prepare for that eventuality.

Lesson # 3: It’s not how you fall. It’s how you bounce back. ‘Di titigil ang mundo sa pag-inog dahil lang sa nadapa ka. And hindi hihintayin ng mundo ang muli mong pagbangon. What you need to do is pick yourself up and dust yourself off, move and try to make a better life for yourself. Because that’s what a fighter do. We move forward and we keep on fighting.

Lesson # 4: Happiness comes to those who seek it. Choosing happiness is a choice. Happiness doesn’t just happen. It’s not an accident, it isn’t a gift. Happiness is up to you. You can choose to be happy instead of choosing to sit in a corner and wait for it to fall in your lap. Happiness is called upon and cultivated.

                                                                                         

Lesson # 5: If there’s one lesson I learned (or probably, relearned) – and I wish I could tell this to everyone- is that “Never doubt yourself”. I’ll admit that I feel mediocre most of the time. Not good, always trailing behind someone. Pero those months of depression made me realize that: Sino pa bang magtitiwala sa sarili ko kundi ako rin? If nobody wants to lift my chair for me then I’ll lift it myself. Or else nobody will know how much I worth. So I’m telling you now, no matter what other people say, no matter how others made you feel, never ever doubt yourself. If you believe in yourself, you will succeed far more than you will ever fail. 

I have to admit that my first post-graduate year wasn’t easy. It was rough, in fact. But because of all the adversities that happened to me, I am much stronger and wiser than I ever thought I could be. I think learning to deal with these things taught me true responsibility and unexpectedly, honor and what true manhood is.

Lessons I Learned From the Azkals

We are a basketball-insane archipelago! We all know that so don’t argue. We claim that game as ours. It’s in our culture. A religion for hard-boiled disciples. But in 2010, a team called Azkals, purporting to be our men’s national football team, made us forget about slam dunks and three point shots for a moment and (from out-of-nowhere) created a one-of-a-kind football revolution. Since then, the team inspires more and more hoop zealots to follow the “beautiful game” as well.

But more than the inspiration and the pride, the Azkals taught me and continues to teach me sensible lessons in football and in life. And please allow me to share some.


1. Not all zeroes are as bad as it sounds. Following and watching the Azkals is for me like watching and awaiting the results of a Pacman match. The excitement. The intensity. The madness. The game is long because the struggle is hard. But never ever boring. Even a scoreless draw is full of excitement because passion and determination prevail. One goal would have the same effect as a 20-nil in the first quarter of a basketball game. And in a country weaned in instant gratification, we are starting to appreciate low scores earned with great difficulty.

2. It’s not how you fall. It’s how you bounce back. The Azkals’ pride to play is tarnished for it has felt defeat, not only once but many times. A nil score is part of our men’s national football team’s history. After all, a whipping boy is not a whipping boy if he always wins. But no matter how many 3-0s or 5-0s it suffers, it keeps on fighting. Despite the odds, it still manages to give good results and deodorizes whatever failures our government has had in many years. If determination has a face, we will surely find the Azkals next to it in the dictionary.

3. Not all bad seeds came from the same fruit. A Thai-Belgian blogger once argued that foreign-trained Filipino athletes played for the country mainly due to sponsorships. But the Azkal players beg to disagree. Considering that they have better paying jobs abroad, one would truly find it remarkable that the Azkal players choose to come home and wear the Philippine colors, even if the monthly allowance of our athletes is “barya-barya lang”. I read a comment someone posted on the Azkals’ fan page that said “sometimes those half-breeds love our country even more” and I agree.

4. Take chances. Remember, there is no harm in trying. Football is too short. In this game, nothing happens to a coward. Seize every moment, every opportunity. Don’t be afraid to take risks, chances. Don’t be afraid to fail because failure is inevitable throughout the game. We are humans, after all. Prone to errors; never exempt from failures. So when you meet shattering number of near-makes and misses, you are left with only two choices. It’s either you continue to strike for a goal, more driven than ever and discover how far your passion can take you or just fold and give up.

5. Sport unites. I am a sports fan. I know that sports unite us, with what Pacman has done for us over and over again. I know that sports can bring a divided nation together and can be a source of pride among us. I am so amused by the support and adoration the Azkals has been getting from the Filipinos – it is impassioned, it is amazing, it is crazy. Others have gone to the extent of professing their undying love to the players. And I have a feeling that such sentiment will truly last. Why not? The Azkals sparked a national bayanihan movement. You see not all national teams get the same level of adoration accorded to the Azkals. To get the love and support of a nation is like winning half the battle.

And the biggest lesson I learned (and the simplest actually) is…

6. Never doubt your own. As cheesy and mushy as it may sound, this is one simple lesson we deeply needed to relearn. Many times, we doubt our abilities as Filipinos. We became fearful and coward. And worse, we feel being inferior to somebody else. We always think of what we cannot do. Rather think of what we are capable of. The Azkals showed what Filipinos can offer the world – our talent, our passion, our determination, our heart and our soul. In the few months that we displayed our love and respect to the Azkals; we had also, unconsciously, displayed our love and respect to our country and its people.

I know the Philippines is broken-hearted. We have been dreaming of Brazil for days. We dream of cheering our own team from the stands of Maracana. It only took an opponent’s victory to author the death of our World Cup dream (at least for now). And it was enough to break our hearts. There are a lot of things I could say that would probably make me feel better. I could whine about how poor the Azkals’ offense was. I could whimper on how Etheridge seemed out of it. I could snivel on how Coach Weiss miscalculated everything. I could sulk in and sour grape for days. But to tell you, I won’t. Should the team apologize for not conquering Kuwait? Of course not.

I don’t defend them just because I'm a fan. I defend them because I'm Filipino. Maybe this is what I learned growing up cheering for and supporting teams which don’t win all the time. No matter how hard we wish, the Azkals can’t have it all. Sometimes we win, sometimes we lose. No matter how ready, no matter how competitive we are, if we are not destined to win, we will not. And that’s the bitter reality: aiming for things that seem too easy to achieve yet very difficult to pursue because it is not meant for us.

Though we didn’t soar as high as we wanted to, I cannot help but feel happy and proud of our football team. Why wouldn’t I? I witnessed how our boys shocked the field. How they jostled it out with the region’s best. How they turned skeptics into believers and believers into fans. How they earned the salutation of the opponents. And most importantly, how they united the country. And for me, that’s more than enough. Even if the Azkals lose, they sort of win.

When the dusts settle and the hullabaloo is gone, it’s easy to see who are the fair-weather friends among the die-hard fans. Because anyone can support a team that is winning - it takes no courage. But to stand behind a team, to defend a team when it is down and really needs you, that takes a lot of courage.