15.11.09

STATUS: Confuse


S***! I can't understand myself. I told her that I don't love her, that I only see her as a close friend. But, why does I feel jealous every time she's fluttering her eyelids to this "guy-from-outer-space"... oops! I mean this "guy-from-other-course"? I can see na masyado siyang kinikilig. And it's breaking my heart.

Last Thursday night, me and Close friend's roommate, J__, were texting. I confided to her this bizaare feeling that I just felt recently towards our friend. And I can tell that she's in the mood to talk possibly evidenced by her upright answers to my questions. She even presented to me these three theories:

1. Maybe you are jealous because you were used na ikaw lang ang lalaki sa buhay niya.

2. Maybe you are jealous because you know that she loves you but now it seems that she's shifting her attention to someone else.

3. Maybe you are jealous because you also like her.

As of now, I don't know what to answer. I'm still totally confuse. Just give me enough time.

***
This post is shoddy for Pete's sake. What's happening to me? Can you please punt me in the head to bring myself back into consciousness?

:|.poOt!


64 comments:

I am Xprosaic said...

Confuse nga... jejejejeje... sige pagisipan mo muna mabuti kung nasan ka ba sa tatlo na yan... jijijijiji... salamat pala sa pagbisita!

Random Student said...

haaaay to be young and confused. wala akong deep na masabi kundi enjoy the ride he-he! 'pag walang kilig at drama ang kabataan mo, medyo boring. try watching dear heart ha-ha!

Jag said...

you`re young...it`s normal...ull find the answer if u go along d way jijijiji...love the background music here...

ShatterShards said...

Gadan kang aki ka!

It is not uncommon for one to develop feelings for another after one has revealed one's feelings, so it may be possible that you're developing feelings for your close friend after she revealed her feelings towards you. The problem with this is your feelings towards her may only be fleeting, for you might have this sense of needing to reciprocate. This route normally doesn't end well for either parties.

But I am much inclined to think that you're feeling jealous because she now has someone else to pour her affections to. The affections previously reserved for you. You just have to get used to the idea that your close friend is a free agent, and therefore, can associate herself with anyone she has a fancy for. As her close friend, be there for her, but do not judge.

Nonoy said...

isa lang ibig sabihin nyan. mahal mo sya ;D

salve said...

you love her i guess...

geb0i said...

i can't hardly disagree. literally, you're definitely in love with your so called 'close friend'. You were having a hard time to admit it for you have ur own risons.. or you weren't completely aware on the feelings you have for her? I guess. Sabe nga nila love usually starts with friendship but cannot merely end in it too. The mere fact that you were confused is that maybe you've become afraid of commitment or you don't want ur friendship to simply end just because of love comes in the first place. Though it is really hard to choose between the two, the decision still lies with you. Go poot

The Nomadic Pinoy said...

Your signs and symptoms are clear. Diagnosis: you are in love.

joycee said...

Sure na you like her. :)

Anonymous said...

wahehehehe..nhem...

poot...i cant really understand you...andami nang time pero your doing nothing...bahala na kayo....

so maybe,your feelings goes this way...you dont love her, you dont like her either as more than friend..you just dont want to loose her kasi youre used na anjan sya lagi...tapos nagseselos ka kasi ayaw mo na may magustuhan syang iba maliban sayo...selfish ka poot..

let her move on...(sorry for saying this)

kung wala ka lang namang gagawin pabayaan mo na siya..

let her live her life without you..kung yun ang gusto nya..kung yun ang paraan para makalimutan ka niya..

dont let her feel so special na hindi din nman i mean dont let her fall for you too much...

once is enough..twice is too much..

ANIMUS said...

iinom mo yan....
haha

m2mtripper said...

Yikes... Mahirap yan, chong!

Pero sa tigin ko, nagseselos ka lang dahil hindi na ikaw ang sentro ng universe n'ya.

Basyon said...

Uiy, salamat nga pala sa pag-bisita. ;D Hhmm, and bout jan sa post moh, naku yan na ang sinasabi kong mapapaisip karin hehe. Cge, kaw nmn nakakaaalam kung asan ka sa tatlong choices na yan eh. Pero for me, cguro kaya ka nag-seselos kasi alam mong ikaw ang gsto nya pero sa iba na ibinabaling ang atensyon nya. parang un parin haha. Mahal mo na cguro no? eeiiii kilig! ;D

April
Stories from a Teenage Mom
Chronicles of a Hermit
Mom on the Run

Alkapon said...

Huwag mo masyadong dibdibin at bigyan ng pansin yan, maco-confused ka nga.

toma na lang tayo.. tagay.. ha ha ha

dabo said...

ei thanks sa blog hop.

ligawan mo kasi, wag torpe, hindi puro speculation

Chyng said...

I think you like her. ;D

Do something!

Mac Callister said...

hey,first time ko dito...

and yeah take your time analyze your feelings bago pa mahuli ang lahat!

go!

Mr. Nonsense said...

right now ur just being possessive. possessive of all the things u listed above. kundi mo sya luv eh di mo talaga luv. so...magtigil ka!

topexpress said...

Think and feel what is the real score. U were given three choices and i believe na its within the three, kaso lang hirap ka lang tanggapin na hindi na siya masyado FOCUS sa iyo gaya ng dati.

If u really like her, and want to WIN her BACK, DO SOMETHING! ACT NOW! kung hindi ka kikilos ngayon, KELAN? kung hindi ikaw, SINO? Kung walang kikilos, PAANO?

Katarungan para sa nararamdaman!

:)

Basyon said...

Uiy! Bakit la pang update? Inaabangan ko pa nmn yang speculation fever na yan haha. Naku wag torpe no! Manligaw kna kasi. Don't waste your time. ;D

April
Stories from a Teenage Mom
Chronicles of a Hermit
Mom on the Run

.pOot! said...

hi xprosaic!

haha. di na ako ganun ka-confuse gaya nung dati. medyo nalinawan na rin ako.

// thanks pala sa pagdaan!

.pOot! said...

hi kuya random!

sinabi mo pa. common na sa mga kabataan na umibig at masaktan. that is part of GROWING UP.

//pero i think marami pang time. i'm just 18. sabi nga ni kuya tripper: young and fresh. lolz.

.pOot! said...

hi kuya jag!

// oo nga. this is just normal. at least in this way, i can prove that i'm still human after all.

it seems that many really like this song. who can blame us? the song was superbly done.


--- OFF-TOPIC: denise laurel is sizzling HOT!

.pOot! said...

hi kuya shattershards!

wow! bicolano yun ah. how did you learn to speak my dialect?

//medye dinege eng eleng ke se engles me. lel.

MAYBE you're right kuya. MAYBE nagui-guilty lang ako kaya i feel na it's a need for me to LOVE her back.

she's single. and i'm only her friend. i don't have the right to feel jealous if she flutter her eyes to someone else. it's none of my business anyway.

.pOot! said...

hi noynoy!

sorry. but i'm not sure.

maybe, what kuya shatter said above is TRUE.

.pOot! said...

hi salve!

you're not new here, right?

oh btw, as i said, i'm not yet sure.

.pOot! said...

hi gervs!

thanks for that.

// these past few days, i kept thinking if i'm ready to enter into a relationship, to have my gf # 2. and i think i'm still not.

it's really frustrating. i'm doubting my capabilities to handle another serious relationship. maybe this is because of my first but very dysfunctional relationship. haiz. i don't want to experiment.

you're right again. i don't want to jeopardize the friendship just because of a-not-very-sure feeling towards her.

.pOot! said...

hi kuya nomad!

really? are you sure doctor nomad? pakiulit naman ng check-up oh. baka nagkamali diagnosis mo.

haha. walang magawa mode!

.pOot! said...

hi ate joycee!

napadan ka ulit! na-miss ka nitong blog ko. hehe!

.pOot! said...

hi anonymous!

yah. maybe i'm just being selfish. siguro ayoko lang mawala siya sa tabi ko. siyempre, pag nagka-bf niya, etsapwera na ako. wala na siyang time para sakin. and if so, what i'm feeling now is not LOVE, it is just simply JEALOUSY.

siguro ganun nga lang yun.

// thanks for visiting my site again, good friend. your advices are really helpful.

.pOot! said...

hi mark!

haha. ambabaw ko naman kung ganun. di pa ako naglalasing dahil sa babae. lolz. wait, nalasing na ba ko? di pa pala. hehe! [read as: i can control myself]

// mark, ano palang V?

btw, ka-batch ko na si ate brenda relleve. remember her?

.pOot! said...

hi kuya tripper!

oo chong. sobrang hirap nga.

// ewan. tama ka siguro.

.pOot! said...

hi ate basyon!

no prob. how's your baby avril btw?

----> yah. ako rin lang naman makakapagsabi kung ano talaga ang nararamdaman ko.// pero ang hirap. parang board exam. multiple choice. tapos pressured ka pa. hahaha.

.pOot! said...

hi kuya alkapon!

sige... labas mo na ang matador.

// bleh. umiba yata ihip ng hangin. kanina paayaw-ayaw pa ko. hahaha. iba na talaga 'pag confuse.

.pOot! said...

hi dabo!

ayaw ko naman ligawan basta-basta. di pa kasi ako sure sa feelings ko, kung LOVE talaga 'tong nararamdaman ko. ampucha!

.pOot! said...

hi ate chyng!

maybe YES, maybe NO.

as of now, i do not know.

---> aba! aba! rhyme. haha.

.pOot! said...

hi kuya mac!

oo nga. bago pa mahuli ang lahat. with your comment, i remember J__, our common friend. madalas rin niyang sabihin 'to.

.pOot! said...

hi mr. nonsense!

selfish and possessive? that's ME!

---> ewan kuya. still undecided. sobrang gulo ng mind ko as of now.

.pOot! said...

hi kuya tope!

tatlo na nga lang pagpipilian, nahihirapan pa ko. ampucha naman!

i'm not her UNIVERSE anymore and that made me sad.

katarungan sa nararamdaman. gustong-gusto ko yan. hahaha. (nagagawa ko pang tumawa)

.pOot! said...

hi ate basyon!

haha. inaabangan mo pala. hehe. medyo di lang naka-OL these past two days. may duty na kasi kami. hai. kakapagod!

Alkapon said...

Binibiro lang kita, gusto mo namang uminom, dyaske kang bata ka..

uminom ka na lang ng gatas, ilagay mo sa bote at lagyan ng tsupon.

sabay jakul.. he he he

PUSANG-kalye said...

salamat for finding me---I'm afraid I have to say sorry though. I changed my url again---this time it's final na talaga. Sorry. a friend of mine proposed it to me so I said yes. please update it again. SALAMAT ng maraming marami.......

PUSANG-kalye said...

yeah---don't worry-In time you'll find. basta keep analyzing your motives muna so that you can sort your emotions. Best of all, don't make any harsh decision or never jump into conclusions muna....cheers~~

.pOot! said...

hi kuya alkapon!

haha. tangins. ok na sana na uminom na lang ako ng gatas kaya lang dapoat pala sabay jakol. lolz.

.pOot! said...

hi kuya pusa!

// no problem. yeah. i'll update your url in my blog roll.

oo kuya. undecided pa ako ngayon. medyo nao-overwhelm pa ako so i don't want to jump into conclusions muna.

pinkdiaries said...

ppsssttt! me too!! hayss!

Anonymous said...

close friend??

is it me??

pwd pakiclear n lhat ng 2???

.pOot! said...

hi ate pink!

APIR! magsama-sama ang mga confuse. lolz.

.pOot! said...

hi anonymous!

huh?

Ax said...

give yourself time. meron tayong tinatawag na "dark age era."

bumalik ka after 28 days.

dun natin malalaman kung mahal mo nga siya.

---huwag magpadalos dalos sa mga gusto mong gawin. baka hindi talaga yan ang nararamdaman mo. 28 days is not long enough.

ShatterShards said...

Taga-Daet ang mom ko, and I spent some summers there before. Tatao ako, pero dai ako maurag.

I agree with @Ax, you need space. Both you and your friend. Masyado kayong magkadikit, you even spend time sa boarding house niya. If, after spending time apart, and the affection still grows, then I guess you have to rethink your motto na walang taluhan.

jasonhamster said...

aminin mo na pareng poot na inlababo ka.

ayos lang yan..

selos??

kasama sa paglaki natin yan..

you'll be used to it....

ligawan mo na kasi. ikaw rin.

blak3nwayt said...

nyahahaha! ayon sa mga dalubhasa, espyalista at walang magawa.. gusto mo siya di mo lang maamin! hakhak!

Basyon said...

Hi friend! Salamat nga pala sa pagbisita sa blog ko. Ung about sa tanong nga pala ng mga nurse sakin eto: Anong lugar ang usually populated ng malaria? Sinagot ko ay sa mahahalaman, at tama nmn. Kasi un ung sinabi nila sa lesson eh ahaha.=D

April
Stories from a Teenage Mom
Chronicles of a Hermit
Mom on the Run

.pOot! said...

hi kuya ax!

at talagang 28 days dapat? uhmmm... ok, i'll try.

// gusto ko talaga munang siguraduhin ang nararamdaman ko. ewan... pati ako naguguluhan. hehe! siguro nga nagiging possesive lang ako.

PHEW! kakainis. naiinis ako sa sarili ko.

.pOot! said...

hi kuya shattershards!

oh really?

nice. bicolano ka din pala. hehe. like you, di rin ako ganun marunong mag-bicolano. nasanay kasi ako na tagalog ang mother tongue ko kaya ayun. trying hard to speak my own dialect. lolz.

// oo nga. di ko rin naman kasi kaya na malayo sa kanya. but if that's the only way, i'll do it. bahala na si batman!

.pOot! said...

hi pareng hamster!

ligawan?

sa ngayon, medyo malabo yata yun. haha.

basta update na lang kita tol kapag di na ako single. hahaha. bleeh!

.pOot! said...

hi blak3nwayt!

newbie here, right? about dun sa sinabi mo, NOT sure. hehe.

thanks sa pagdaan. :)

.pOot! said...

hi ate basyon!

haha. ang galing naman. good listener ka pala. applause!

Anonymous said...

hai naku, nagtanung kp f cno aq...

c nix 2...

28 days??

i think its the best thing to do now, d q na din mastand na magpretend kpag ksma ka, ang hirap...

28 days start now...walang pansinan...walng communication walang lahat...23 days to go birthday ko..that would be enough...23 days lang....patawad na ang 5 days kay kuya AX..

ma mi miss kita...mahirap to tol...

mag usap muna tayo...pagbalik natin sa dorm ngayon....

Anonymous said...

hi...whew...what the..ano na namang darama to nyung dalawa...pero i think and hope that,that space that she gave you gamitin mo para mag isip ng maayos...na pagbalik mo...malinaw na lahat..kung ano man yang nararamdaman mo....

.pOot! said...

hi Close friend!

what can i say?

NOTHING. i'm speechless.

kung mahirap 'to para sa'yo 'tol, mas lalo naman sakin. bakit kasi may 28 days pa? pwede next year na lang? hehe. i can't stand it.

Anonymous said...

alam q mahirap din 2 para sayo, kya nga we both need time to think.. we need space...

kya pumayag kn lng dun sa cnbi ni kuya ax...

Anonymous said...

alam ko nahihirapan k din... kya nga we both need time to think... we need space...

kya pumayag kn lng s cnbi ni kuya ax... it will help... i think...