18.6.10

Dear Mr. President


WARNING: This entry is not for the faint hearted.


Photobucket


First and foremost, let me congratulate you for your suh-weet victory. With almost 14 million votes, you won without any difficulty and finished way way ahead than my much-deserving bet and your cousin, Gibo Teodoro. Actually, I'm expecting from the start your easy victory but still, I didn't gave in to the pressure from my friends and family to vote for you. Duh! Honestly, I rather eat booger than to vote for a lame-duck president like you. Yes good senator, you read me right, I just compared you to a lame duck. I firmly believe that you cannot run a country because on your 12 years of being a politician, you just sashayed your way in and you just sashayed your way out of the Congress and that's it. What a waste of time and money your so-so performances were.


Good senator, if you doesn't take advantage of being the son of Ninoy and Cory, I doubt your ability to win this election. Seriously. You always basked behind the shadows of your parents and continue to do so even after their deaths. And it's kinda an overkill. You are a trying hard copycat of your father! Pardon me sir, but your father is much more intelligent, much more competent, much more charismatic and better looking than you sir. Are you sure he is your father? Because, really sir, there is no trace of Ninoy in you.

Every campaign advertisements you used last election played up your promise to eliminate corruption. That's a lie! It is impossible to eliminate corruption in our present society. And with you as our president? That's fncking impossible sir! That may not sound very pleasing to the ears and I'm not being negative too but that's reality. So stop pandering to us like we're a bunch of illiterates. Anyway, maybe your laughing your ass out while reading my letter because my arguments are already null. You are now the 15th President of the Philippines. You won sir, you won!

I wrote this letter not just to insult you but also to give you a suggestion. My original plan is to make a paper boat and make it float on Pasig River and hope that it would reach your table and be read by you. But it's kinda stupid these days, circa 2010. Going back to my suggestion, puh-leez reappoint Esperanza Cabral as DOH secretary. She's one hell of a secretary! She did an awesome showing by proving that she is no push over. She got the platinum balls to get things done even if it goes against the beliefs of some irritating Catholic Church leaders. Pardon me again sir but I believe that she will be a better president than you.

In two weeks time, you will take your oath as the president. And for sure, you're pretty excited that you bought a wig - haha, I'm kiddding sir. Seriously, your team has been preparing for this for months now. Oh, I bet that would be "the greatest show in town" with lots and lots of celebrities. With Kris as the director, that would be spectacular! Anyway, my challenge to you is this - work on your fashion sense, be Noynoy and not just your parent's son and most importantly, don't disappoint those who voted for you pretty fucking please. And another thing, may you not be stupid enough to forget that you actually promised the moon and stars for us. You may not know me sir but I'll stick my eyes on you. And if you screwed up, don't worry, I'll be there to punch you in the face. Goodluck President Noynoy!

Truly yours,

Jubert John R. Marzan

Source of photo here

33 comments:

.pOot! said...

Just drank a lot of energy drinks to get this article done :) HAHA!

And guys, YEY! Lakers won!

len said...

wow, ang sexy naman! yummy.. ahahaa

arnie said...

hahahaha...natawa ako sa picture...di bagay..lol

well sana mabasa nya ito poot...hahah hindi pa rin nagsisink-in sa akin na sya na ang President coz it sucks... >:)

But we have no choice walang mangyayari kung puros patama at pangbabatikos ang mangyayri. we just have to wait for his actions...

petitay said...

:) let's wait and see what he could do to change pinas..! p-noy should work well dahil kung hindi mag oorganize ako ng rally for him. lols..

Joni Rei said...

hahaha! wth. I wonder wut would be his reaction if he reads your letter :))

Anyways, just dropping here pOot. I actually can't remember when was the last time I dropped by here. lol.

PABLONG PABLING said...

artistahin.

hayst nanalo ang pinaka ayaw kong manalo

Kura said...

hahah! puso mo... ang kulit ng pic. meron lang din sana akong request sa kanya... makiki-ride na rin ako. Pero ung address mo lang ang ibibigay mo kung sakali ha. hahaha! LOL!

Dear Noy,
All celebrations and Holidays must fall on the nearest Monday ha.. We get used to it na. Yan lang ang nagustuhan ko sa lahat ng ginawa ni Gloria. Kaya please don't screw it up... thank you!

Jag said...

Wala na tayong magagawa but to support him instead...

Happy Saturday buddy! God Bless!

Ax said...

We will be saved! We have a new president.

Aw. That goes to Americans.

Anyways, happy father's day to your dad!

definella said...

ang tapang nung last sentence, baka mabaril ka rin gaya ni ninoy ah, joke :)


swerte ni noynoy, anak sya ng aquino, dahil kun hindi, naku.. kulelat sya.

pusang kalye said...

it's going to be a long , rough ride ahead...I hope all the economic gains of the past 9 years of uninterrupted growth will not go down the drain. If not---sasama ako sa welga for the 1st time to oust somebody from office under grounds of INCOMPETENCE.brace yourselves Filipinos.

Sows said...

hnd bagay poot.

its kaka.
suka.
peace!
patay ka, anjan na si kris.
:p

KRIS JASPER said...

Wow! FHM mag?

lol

goyo said...

bwaaha! ang macho naman ni ngoyngoy. pagdasal na lang natin na maging matagumpay sya bilang presidente.

Joyo said...

ang taray! give him a chance poot... para maentertain tayo :lol: hahaha!

.pOot! said...

Hey Ate Len! I dare you to taste him but don't blame me if you vomit your stomach out. Hahaha. Peace!

.pOot! said...

Right Kuya Arnie. Let's give him a chance to prove himself but I kinda doubt it. :)

.pOot! said...

That's good Petitay! I'm keep on thinking is there any chance that he'll be kicked out of office through People Power. If so, that would be funny!

.pOot! said...

Sup Baby Joni? I think he'll laugh his ass out. And after reading, he'll get the phone and call Kris asking what to do with me. Hahaha. Then Kris will contact the media for a presscon. VOILA! I'm a celebrity... after 15 mins, I'm dead.

What you think?

.pOot! said...

Hey Paps! Yeah, I hate him and I don't want him to win but he's better than the trying-hard Madrigal. Anyway, they both sucks!

.pOot! said...

I kinda disagree with your proposition Ate Kura. Haha, peace!

.pOot! said...

Hey Kuya Jag! Can't agree more. From now on til 2016, we have to live with it. :(

.pOot! said...

Thanks Kuya Ax. Same to you... *clears throat* I mean to your dad.

.pOot! said...

Hi Ella! That's an advantage of being an Aquino.

.pOot! said...

Kuya Anton, sama ako. Haha! Yes, I hope that he can maintain if not improve the economic stat of the country. That's one of Arroyo's legacy.

livingstain said...

parang katawan ni dencio un ahh... lol

musta poot... graduate na ba?

Allen said...

hell for 6 years. gah!

Kura said...

it's ok. I don't have a problm with that. =) I just love long weekend. Hindi kasi kami kasali pag nag-aannounce ang Deped ng walang pasok. kaya yun na lang ang pag-asa ko. stress kasi sa work. hahaha! nag explain talaga e no. :) have a nice day!

Bradpetehoops said...

Impressive photo of PNOY!

Leah said...

Hey.. Meron din akong parehong post sa blog ko.. pero di ganito katapang. hehe! I wonder what PNoy would feel if he gets to read this? Baka padalhan ka ng time bomb sa bahay nyo.. Haha.. =)

aajao said...

hehe ang tapang naman.

Anonymous said...

work on your grammar, dimwit.

poot said...

Work on your courage, pinhole.


:P